the chapter of khairiyah mckenzie
the only thing i hate in my life is the thought of always being alone. but somehow, it seems that its what i always get. but i try to understand what i have to go through. but i dont. because i dont know why im always alone. nobody can rescue me from the loneliness inside. like a screaming pain. even as the tears blurred my vision, i sit down all alone. even as the tears slipped from my eyes, i can only cry in silence.
i thought hari raya was what a family was to be. but it wasnt. maybe its the fact that my parents were so tired to even go out with us. it tore me apart. cause im still that little girl clinging onto her mummy to fed her. i have to let go. but i cant. when mummy is there, i wont have to battle for attention cause she would give me hers. i still need her wings to keep me warm. so i was trying to brave. i was supposed to be somebody instead of just sucking up on someone else. i just needed my own space no matter where i go. sometimes, nobody can tell me what to do unless its my mummy. i dont take orders. it kinda pricks me when i think about it. so i shall not think.
maybe i needed a reason to cry. to my heart's content. to my own fulfillment[whatever it means].
the only thing i hate in my life is the thought of always being alone. but somehow, it seems that its what i always get. but i try to understand what i have to go through. but i dont. because i dont know why im always alone. nobody can rescue me from the loneliness inside. like a screaming pain. even as the tears blurred my vision, i sit down all alone. even as the tears slipped from my eyes, i can only cry in silence.
i thought hari raya was what a family was to be. but it wasnt. maybe its the fact that my parents were so tired to even go out with us. it tore me apart. cause im still that little girl clinging onto her mummy to fed her. i have to let go. but i cant. when mummy is there, i wont have to battle for attention cause she would give me hers. i still need her wings to keep me warm. so i was trying to brave. i was supposed to be somebody instead of just sucking up on someone else. i just needed my own space no matter where i go. sometimes, nobody can tell me what to do unless its my mummy. i dont take orders. it kinda pricks me when i think about it. so i shall not think.
maybe i needed a reason to cry. to my heart's content. to my own fulfillment[whatever it means].
riyah starr@ 5:30 pm